I prayed, my family prayed, and friends prayed that the diagnosis would not be cancer. A word had been dropped in my spirit that 'the report would confound the wise.' Yet, when I sat in that doctor’s office and heard, 'Mrs. Barr, you have Multiple Myeloma,' it took my breath away; I heard nothing else after that. My immediate thought was, Lord, I thought you said the report would confound the wise?

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His voice was loud and clear: 'I did not say which report.'

Little did I know that my journey through this diagnosis, and every aspect of it, would indeed 'confound' the wise. Sharing this with my family and close friends wasn’t easy, but we decided to fight the only way we knew how. We trusted God, we prayed, and we stood on HIS infallible Word! We agreed to share only the good news and to testify to HIS goodness and healing power. There is NO FAILURE in HIM!

 

Months earlier, February 2018 my mother was diagnosed with Hodgkin’s Lymphoma; receiving the news of my diagnosis was a double blow.  On the same day she was scheduled for a follow-up visit with the doctor, I had an appointment with the doctor to discuss my results.  Not wanting to worry her about my health issues, I chose to tell her that my visit with the doctor was to discuss her path forward.  Never in my life did I expect to hear what the doctor said that day.  As I walked into the waiting room, all I wanted to do was fall into her arms and weep like a baby. But then I saw her, she had a smile on her face and excitement in her voice. She asked, "How did the doctor say I was doing?" That strength stopped me from breaking, and I looked at her and said, "He said you were doing very well."

I couldn't tell her that I was also sick when she had just been told she was in remission. It wasn't until months later that I finally shared my diagnosis; we cried together and promised to be there for each other.

 

Sadly, in August 2018, I lost my mom to complications from her compromised immune system.  The grief hit harder than my own diagnosis, and of course other fears surfaced making me question if I would survive.  Yet through it all, God kept me. Two days after losing my mother, the doctor confirmed she passed from immune complications, not cancer, and encouraged me that it was not going to happen to me—a direct word of peace for my fear. It was as if God was speaking directly through him, easing my fear that the same fate awaited me. Then, he shared incredible news: I was in remission. He could not believe that in such a short time, my protein levels had dropped significantly—the exact breakthrough needed before my bone marrow transplant. Amidst all the pain and sorrow, God gave me HOPE.

 

That day, my best friend and I went throughout the town sharing my testimony to the GLORY of God. Truly, the report confounded the wise! I saw God’s hand on my life, reminding me of John 11:4: “This sickness is not unto death, but for the glory of God.” 

 

At that moment in my life, I made a conscious decision that I would find joy on this journey and continue to trust Him with my life. I know that words hold power, and I choose to speak life! Just as Mark 11:23 promises, I believe that “I shall have whatsoever I say.” Because of this, my life is a testimony, and people will not only hear it, but they will also be eyewitnesses to it.

 

In January 2019, I underwent a bone marrow transplant. Through tears and moments of fear, I chose to stand on God’s promises, knowing He was with me every step of the way. That journey was not sent to destroy me, but to perfect me! I became more intimate with Him as He began to do a 'New Thing' in my life. He strategically placed every doctor, nurse, chaplain, and technician, leaving me with no doubt that HE was in control. His anointing and favor rested on me like a shield, providing comfort when the uncertainties flooded my mind. I smiled when I should have cried, and I fought harder when I wanted to give up—not because of my own strength, but because He was and always will be my Commander-in-Chief. Knowing He created me from nothing, I trusted that He alone had the power to heal my body.

 

This journey continues to change my life, and each day, I am witnessing the answer to my question, 'Why me?' In 2023, I was introduced to the beginning stages of the Beauty for Ashes Foundation, where I walked with other cancer survivors to showcase God’s grace and testify to His glory.

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In 2024, I was invited by the Foundation to be a model in the inaugural Beauty for Ashes Fashion Show. Although I was nervous about the runway, I accepted—and it blessed me in unimaginable ways. Celebrating others while being celebrated brought me an unspeakable joy; God’s presence truly filled the room.

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In 2025, I was invited back, and I didn’t think it could get any better. Yet, seeing men and children added to the lineup and hearing their personal testimonies brought an even deeper joy—knowing that only God could do this. Survivors—women, men, and children—deserve to be celebrated and to share their stories; it makes the journey so much easier. For some of us, this truly is our “bell-ringing moment.”

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Many thanks to Tammorra Golder for stepping forward with the vision God blessed her with. I look forward to the greater things the Lord will inspire her to do!

 

Today, seven and a half years later, I am still trusting God with my life. As I stand, a Trophy of His Grace, I will continue to testify to His glory and share the hope I have in Him with those who ask, 'Where did your strength come from?' In the words of a dear sister-friend and fellow cancer survivor, 'I don’t look like what I’ve been through.' And honestly? I don't feel like it, either—because His strength was made perfect in my weakness.

 

My journey and suffering have purpose; It was never about me! 

 

Marion Barr

 

“Living my Life Coram Deo ~ In the presence of God, Under the Authority of God and for the Glory of God.”